


In Between

by bookworm03



Series: The First Lady [2]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Affairs, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Law Enforcement, F/M, First Lady AU, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-07 20:16:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10368570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm03/pseuds/bookworm03
Summary: Leslie's caught between two men, but which is her past and which is her future? First Lady AU.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Part Two in this series! 
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone reading and reviewing the first fic. Things definitely get a bit more...dramatic, so you have been warned. 
> 
> Thank you to c00kie and ashisfriendly for helping and being supportive. <3 
> 
> Comments and kudos, as always, are amazing.

She’s in a daze.

Her skin is burning, her insides throb and the palpitations won’t stop. They haven’t stopped since she left his room that morning.

“Mooooom?” Sophie sing-songs. She’s at the kitchen counter, spearing waffles onto plates and pouring cups of coffee. “Did you sleep at all?”

Sophie’s asking because of the attempt on the president’s life. Leslie’s husband’s life. Of course it would not be surprising if she hadn’t slept a wink. Sophie climbs into the chair beside her and pushes the waffles forward. They’re crispy and golden and as perfect as the ones from JJ’s, but Leslie’s not hungry. She takes a sip of her coffee instead and sighs.

“Where’s the...”

Sophie produces a massive can of whipped cream and Leslie thanks her. Sophie squeezes her arm.

“So the answer to did you sleep at all would be no.”

“I slept a little.”

A thick, sludgy guilt churns around in Leslie’s stomach. She’d dozed in his arms, his long fingers winding strands of curls around them and his lips against her forehead. His heart had been beating beneath her cheek.

“Mom?” Leslie jolts and Sophie stares at her. “Dad said you never came to bed. He figured you were in the Map Room.”

“I was,” Leslie manages to lie. She’s too tired to overthink things and it comes out surprisingly easily. “Dad was gone before I came to bed.”

That had the benefit of being true. Leslie had stayed away all night and Ed had already been in briefings by the time she’d returned. Ann strolls into the room, dressed for the day in a silk blouse and pencil skirt. There are folders clutched to her chest.

“I had them lay out your clothes.” She explains. “Ed will be done his briefing in about twenty minutes and then we’ll make our statement.”

Sophie starts to frown and say something about school, but Ann says there’ll be no school for her today.

“Enjoy the long weekend, kiddo.” Ann gestures at Leslie. “The cameras will be here in about an hour and then he’s going to China.”

“Great.” Sophie grumbles, head in her hands. “Just perfect.”

She gets her sarcasm from her father.  

*****

Sophie's dressed in pajama pants and a tank top and they're curled up in the middle of Leslie’s bed, a bowl of M&Ms between them. They’d started the evening by making macaroni and cheese from scratch and getting mani-pedis with Ann before she went home.

And now they’re getting ready to watch _The Birds_ and _Psycho._

“Did you talk to Dad today?” Sophie asks. Leslie nods.

“He’s great. Never better. He said tell Soph not to worry and I’ll call her tomorrow.”

Leslie tucks a strand of hair behind her daughter’s ear as her phone vibrates on the nightstand. Sophie shoots her a warning look.

“T-minus thirty seconds until I’m starting this.”

Leslie agrees quickly and snatches her phone up. It’s a number she doesn’t recognize, but she knows who it is.

_How are you?_

She types back. _We’re great_ . _How are you?_

_If you’re great, I’m great._

Leslie bites back a silly grin and Sophie shoots her a perplexed look.

“Ewwww, are you texting Dad?”

“Nooooo.” Leslie quickly put the phone down. “Grandma.”

“You’re super lying and that’s disgusting. Tell him goodnight and we’re starting the movie and I said stop being gross.”

Leslie rubs her hand across her mouth.

_Sophie says goodnight._

She waits.

 _Give her a kiss for me_.

Leslie’s lips find Sophie’s temple as they snuggle down into the pillows together.

*****

He falls into her arms and Leslie laughs softly, rubbing his back. He’s done this countless times, when he was still at the law firm, when they were running campaigns together, he always falls into her arms.

The guilt is back.

“I missed you.”

“Me too.” She’d spent the entire ten days thinking about the assassination attempt and what had followed.

Ten days thinking about Ben.

Ed’s hands slip up her sides, to the bottom of her towel. When they creep back up his fingers latch onto the hem.

He kisses her neck and exhales.

“I was thinking about Paris.”

He pulls away and Leslie meets his eyes. His forehead drops to hers. He’s wearing the cologne she bought him for Christmas.

“I was an ass. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It didn’t matter anyway.”

He rubs her hip through the cotton. “Actually, that’s what I was thinking about.” 

His other hand reaches behind Leslie and lifts a package off the counter. He holds up the pills and waggles them.

“I was thinking, maybe you stop taking these.”

Her eyes widen, but he continues. “If we get pregnant soon you’ll have the baby before the reelection campaign really kicks into gear.”

“I thought…” she swallows hard. “I thought you didn’t want another - ”

“I gained some perspective recently.” He tucks a curl behind her ear. When he dips down for a kiss it’s light and he nips in a way that makes Leslie’s stomach pull. “And I do want a baby with you.”

“Honey.” She palms his cheek and they end up kissing again. He growls against her mouth. The pills are chucked into a garbage can and Leslie’s towel is discarded before she can finish a thought.

Ed wants another baby.

“What...you have that meeting.”

“They’ll wait.” He captures her lips again. She can’t remember the last time he made anyone wait for this. Leslie moans and his hands go to her ass. He pushes into her without any warning and her heels dig into his back as he thrusts hard and deep. His rhythm is impossible to match, but when he tilts her hips and bites her neck Leslie sees stars and it doesn’t matter anymore. They come together, panting, and Leslie laughs.

“Mhmmm.”

“Mhmm.” He agrees, kissing her mouth again. “Love you.”

Her butt hurts from the counter and she’s pretty sure they almost broke a mirror, but she’s content. Ed nuzzles her ear, licking and nibbling until he softens and slips out of her. He hands her a tissue.

“Sir?” There’s a light knock at the bathroom door. Ed sighs.

“Yes, Ben?”

Leslie squeaks but Ed shakes his head. She feels the color drain from her face.

“It’s time to go.”

“Fine.” Ed pulls away completely and starts to redress. Leslie grabs a robe and covers herself. A quick glance in the mirror confirms she looks like a woman who’s just been fucked. She splashes some water on her face and Ed shoots her a curious look.

“He’s not going to come into the bathroom, sweetheart.”

Ed finishes dressing and pulls open the door. Ben’s eyes don’t leave the president’s face.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, sir.”

Ed waves him off, striding into the bedroom and then the hallway without another word. Ben glances at Leslie, who tightens her robe.

“Welcome back.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”

He turns to go and she calls him back. She shouldn’t. She shouldn’t feel the need to explain what just happened in the privacy of her own bedroom.

Well, bathroom.

“Ben.”

His expressionless face relaxes into a tiny smile. He touches her chin and dips his head. His lips are soft and it’s barely more than a peck, but somehow this little kiss feels more erotic than what just happened on the counter.

“I missed you.” He whispers, before leaving the room too.  

She collapses into a chair and swallows a sob.

*****

She tells Ann.

She’s slept with Ben one more time since he returned from China and, if possible, her feelings were only amplified by a quickie in one of the spare rooms at Camp David. He’d been wearing no cologne, the tiniest bit of aftershave clinging to his shirt as she bit down on his neck while he slid into her.

And she tells Ann because two times is two times too many and she needs to confide in the most competent, professional and beautiful Chief of Staff/best friend in the entire world.

“Oh, Leslie.”

“I know.”

“Leslie.”

“I know, Ann!” She reaches for the container of ice cream and takes and huge spoonful. Ann rubs her back.

“I hate to say it, but it felt like it was only a matter of time.”

Leslie squawks through a mouthful of rocky road. “Noooo, Ann. That means you thought I would be the type of person who would...this...what about Ed!”

“It doesn’t mean I think you’re any type of person, it’s just you and Ben have a lot of history and unresolved emotions and when he came here…”

Leslie takes another bite of ice cream.

“He could’ve said no to this job - ”

“Who says no to the president’s detail?!”

“Who says yes to watching another guy raise your daughter?”

Leslie winces.

“I should’ve told him before, when I was pregnant. I should’ve made him listen.”

“This is not your fault.” Ann squeezes her shoulder. “This a shitty situation that neither of you were ready for at eighteen and now you’re trying to deal with it.”

“By having an affair.” It’s the first time she’s said it out loud. “Oh my god, I’m having an affair, Ann.”

Ann wraps her up in a tight embrace.

“We’ll figure it out. We always do.”

*****

They’re sitting in the limo outside the White House and somehow they’re alone, save for the driver who has the partition up. Leslie adjusts her dress a little and shivers at the feeling of lips on her ear.

They don’t form words, just ghost over her skin as he speaks.

“You’re beautiful.”

His tongue flicks and she lolls her head into him as he swirls. She swallows a groan and sits up just as the limo door opens and Ed slides inside along with another agent.

Ben’s eyes flick between her and the window for the rest of the drive.

*****

Her overpriced lace bra itches and she sort of just wishes he would rip it off her, but it’s his birthday and he likes how her boobs look in it. They’re having a lot of sex these days. More sex than they’ve had since he got elected. His hands are going to her clothes as soon as the bedroom door closes behind them, or he’s sneaking into bed after working late and touching her until she pulls him on down.

It reminds her of those first few months of dating, honestly. Where there was lots of lip biting and kissing to keep from moaning too loudly with Sophie in the room next to them. Leslie’s apartment walls had been so thin.

She kisses Ed’s throat when he fills her up. He snaps his hips and Leslie groans.

“Good, honey?”

She nods, rubbing the back of his neck and trying not to think about anyone else.

*****

“It’s perfect.”

“It is?” She snuggles against him and Ben rubs her shoulder.

“Well, not perfect, I’d change this line here a little.” He types one handed to avoid moving his arm from around her. His eyes shift down the monitor. “And I’d switch these two paragraphs.”

He does it, again, one handed, and sits back to let her inspect.

“You need to end on the thing that matters more to you.”

“I thought I should end with the one more aligned with his policy on - ”

“Is it Ed’s speech or yours?”

Leslie lifts her eyes to meet Ben’s. It’s the first time he’s called the president by his first name...with Leslie present, at least.

“End with what’s more important to you.”

“You’re right.” She admits with a little pout. Ben grins and pecks her lips.  

“I know.”

*****

“Morning Ben.”

Leslie looks up as Ben strides into the room in track pants and a t-shirt. He nods politely.

“Good morning, Mr. Knope.”

They’re in Indiana, visiting. Sophie’s upstairs still sleeping and Ed’s been working in her father’s study since dawn. Leslie had tried to ask him what was so important he hadn’t slept more than seven hours over the last three nights, but Ed said not to worry, it’s under control. They’re supposed to be relaxing for a few days before he rolls out an Executive Order.

But no one in their family is very good at relaxing.

“Where’s Ed?” Robert Knope asks. Ben explains they’re going for a run. Leslie feels a shiver run through her as his eyes rake over her. That’s always how she feels these days. She thinks of the night before when Leslie had been trying to work on her quilt and had somehow ended up in his arms.

“Morning.” Marlene Griggs-Knope enters the room behind Ben. She heads straight for the coffee pot.

“My granddaughter is still sleeping, I take it?”

“It’s what teenagers do.” Robert says as Marlene gives a nod of acknowledgement at Ben. Robert stands and brushes imaginary dust off his shirt. “I suppose I’ll join you on the run if Ed doesn’t mind.”

“He won’t mind.” Leslie answers definitively. Marlene reminds her husband to take it easy and he waves her off as he exits the room. Ben glances at Leslie and then follows.

Marlene raises an eyebrow.

“Sweetheart?”

“Hmm?”

“Eventually someone else is going to realize you’re sleeping with him.”

Leslie’s head snaps back, her blood turning to ice in her veins. “What?”

“Ben.”

“What...no...I’m not...never. I’ve never had sex with anyone, anywhere...” her shoulders slump. “How do you know?”

“That little exchange was plenty.”

“I’ll tell him to be more careful.”

“That man has always looked at you that way. He’s not the problem.”

Leslie blushes.

“What are you going to do?”

She has absolutely no idea.

*****

His kisses are slow, almost hauntingly so, and his hands slide over her back, to her neck and face, and back down again. Leslie sighs against his tongue.

“I leave in the morning.”

“I know.”

“I know you know.” She tugs on his tie. “Will you keep an eye on Sophie? He’s so busy, and I know she has Andy, but…”

Ben’s forehead lands on hers and his eyes flutter shut. Leslie does the same.

“Of course I will.”

She scoops up his lips again, only this time the kiss is more biting and urgent. Ben turns and they stumble backwards and onto the bed.

*****

He’s angry.

Red-faced, blood pounding in his ears angry. Leslie squares her shoulders and waits for the onslaught.

“What the hell is this?” she spits at her, tossing the birth control package into the center of their mattress. Leslie inhales.

She panicked. That’s what the hell it is. She’s doing something horrible despite her best intentions and she can’t get pregnant and not know whose baby it is.

“You were mad at me I wasn’t excited about a baby in Paris and now you’re sneaking this behind my back?”

“I’m not sneaking anything.”

“They’re used, sweetheart.”

The way he says _sweetheart_ is cold and biting. He’s stressed. She knows he’s so stressed and that’s why he’s reacting like this.

“I...think we should wait.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t like the idea of trying to squeeze in a pregnancy before your reelection campaign takes off. If it happens, it happens, but I think we should wait…Ed...”

He storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

*****

He whispers _I love you_ against her lips like it’s a secret and the last rein of his self control slipped out of his grasp. It’s breathless, his fingers carding through her hair and then plucking at her sensible shift dress while she tries to undo buttons on his shirt.

He picks her up before she can finish and tosses her onto the mattress, crawling over her with a look that’s more predatory than anything. She briefly tries to recall if her husband has ever looked at her like that. She knows for a fact Ben has never stopped.

He peels off her panties and settles between her thighs, smirking, before his mouth descends.

*****

“Les?” Beautiful sunflower Ann Perkins takes a seat beside her on the balcony. It’s a warm spring day and the thick, swampy humidity hasn’t hit DC yet. They stare out at the Washington Monument for a few peaceful seconds before Ann continues.

“What are you going to do?”

Leslie knows what she’s asking but plays dumb anyway. Ann’s smooth brow creases.

“About Ben. You can’t keep this up.”

Ann is beautiful and wise and Leslie knows this is true. She knows what they’re doing is so wrong, but she can’t help but want to keep going. She can’t help but feel like her past self made a sequence of bad decisions that led her to where she is now.

What if she’d told Ben she was pregnant then? Would he have joined the military? Would she have even met Ed?

“I want to end it.”

“With Ben?”

“Ed.”

As soon as the words are out of her mouth she feels the back of her throat getting tight. Ann squeezes her hand.

“Leslie.”

“I can’t do it now though. I can’t hurt his reelection campaign. He’s...I love him and I still care about him, I just…”

“Don’t want to be married to him.”

Leslie nods.

“And Sophie…”

“He is the only father she’s ever known. He’s a good father.”

“He is.”

“What do I do, Ann. Tell me. You’re my Chief of Staff. It’s your job.”

“Leslie...have you asked Ben what he wants?”

She stops. Has she? She always assumed it was her. From the way his hands pulled on her when she kissed him that first night, she always assumed he wanted to be with her.

“Even if Ben doesn’t want to be with me I don’t want to be with Ed anymore.” It’s the most honest thing she’d ever admitted to herself. She feels stifled in her marriage, unimportant. Ed will be done with politics when his presidency is over. He’ll be practically retired and her career won’t even have started, but they will do what he wants. They always do.

She loves him, but she can’t be married to him anymore.

Ann says nothing, so Leslie continues.

“I can’t do this to him before his reelection though.”

“There’s no good time to end a marriage.”

“I can’t jeopardize his second term.”

“Leslie.”

“I can’t, Ann. It’s not fair to him.”

She would talk to him, just not now. Not when he needed his head in the game.

*****

“I want a divorce.” She tells Ben one night when they’re alone in the Map Room. Ben arches an eyebrow and turns to her.

He does not look happy, but he’s not angry either. His face is neutral. She hates how easily he manages that.

“You do.”

“Yes.”

“But not until he’s re-elected.”

She gives a little nod. Ben reaches for her hand.

“Or during his second term, if there is one.”

There would be. Ed’s approval ratings are still high; he’s a good president.

“No, I...yes.”

“Yes, you would divorce him during his second term?”

Crap, she hadn’t thought about that. How would that look on his presidency? Did she really want to put that cloud over it for the history books?

Ben kisses her palm.

“What do you want?” She says.

“To have you fall asleep in my bed.”

Her heart lifts and his arms wrap around her.

“And wake up in my bed.”

She sighs when he kisses her neck.

“And marry me.” He moves to her lips.

“Marry me.”

And then the door opens.

“Ben - ”

Leslie practically shoves Ben away. He wipes his mouth casually before turning to face Andy. Oh god, Andy.

“Uh…”

“What’s up?”

“The president wants to see you.”

Andy avoids her eyes as Ben walks to the door. Still he’s without a flicker of emotion on his face. Leslie calls Andy back, but either she does so too quietly or he pretends not to hear her.

He’s gone before she can explain herself.

As if there’s anything to explain.


End file.
